How to Make a Message in a Bottle (The Wrong Way)
I am often asked how to make a message in a bottle, and I never know quite what to say. See, I find them–I don’t make them. You might as well ask me how to make the bottle itself. (Ah, you melt some sand, see, and poke a metal straw into it and blow…).
I’m not sure I can tell you how to make a message in a bottle, but I can definitely tell you how not to. That’s because I have found a TON of failed messages in bottles over the years. This is the first in a series of posts that will respond to the question “How do I make a message in a bottle?” by showing you what not to do.
(Have YOU made a message in a bottle? What are your tips and tricks? Share your ideas by commenting below!)
This first message in a bottle falls into a category I have coined: “mess in a bottle”. Just check out the carnage wrought upon this poor letter by the author and executioner:

How NOT to Make a Message in a Bottle – shaved wine cork stuck into the neck of a beer bottle.